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If you want a someone to snuggle up with on the sofa, your FWB is not the ideal person.

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You could feel more relaxed with them, and so be able to explore different ways of having sex that you'd be too nervous to attempt otherwise.

Are you sure you're capable of admitting to yourself whether you really like them?

Sex with someone you care about, without all the responsibility or emotional drama that can come with a more serious relationship – sounds ideal really, doesn't it?

While it's obvious that one of the benefits is well, duh, more sex, there are some other potential ups and downs you might want to consider.

Or are you the kind of person who can kid herself into believing everything's under control when in fact everything's going haywire?

Even if you're capable of digging deep and recognising the friendship and sex for what it is, they may not be able to, says Kerner.

Once you're in FWB mode, you don't need to worry about coming across as too keen or worrying about whether you ought to call them or wait for them to call you.

"In theory, the friends-with-benefits situation allows you both to relax," says sex therapist Dr Ian Kerner (

It's partly physiological as hormones are released during sex that make you bond with them and them with you on an emotional level; it's partly psychological because we're programmed by society, movies, etc to connect sex with love.

That puts you in a position where you're far more likely to get emotionally involved, even when you don't plan to...

If you want a date to take to your friends wedding, your FWB is not the ideal person.

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